I have, I have one job (-) and it is a pretty simple job (--) ahe, I am coming in the morning, (-) and (-) we look at the news, (-) and I write jokes about it (-) and then I make a couple of faces, (-) and (-) like (-) like a noise, like a huh (-) and (-) and it is just ka-ching, (-) and I am out the door (2.0) uhm, (---) but I, I did not do my job today (-) I did not, so I apologize, (-) I got nothing for you (-) in terms of- (-) like jokes and sounds (--) uh because of of what happened in South Carolina and maybe (-) if (-) I was not here at the end of the run or this was not such a common occurrence, (-) maybe uh I could have pulled out the spiral, (-) but I did not (--) and so (---) I honestly have, have nothing, uh (-) other than just sadness once again (-) that we (-) have to pear into the abyss of (-) the depraved violence that we do to each other in the nexus of a-, (-) just gaping (---) racial wound that (-) will not heal, yet we pretend does not exist (-) and (---) I am confident though (--) that (2.0) by acknowledging it, (-) by staring into that, (---) and seeing it for what it is, (--) we still will not do jackass (---) yeah (--) that is us (--) and that is the part that blows my mind, (-) I do not want to get into the political argument of the the guns of things and but- (-) but what blows my mind is (-) the disparity of response, (--) between when we think (-) people (-) that are foreign are going to kill us (-), and us killing ourselves (--) if this had been (---) what we thought was Islamic terrorism, it would fit into our- we we invaded two countries (--) and spent trillions of dollars, (-) and thousands of American lives, (-) and now fly uh uh (-) unmanned (--) death-machines over like five or six different countries, (-) all to keep Americans safe (--) that has got to- we we got to do whatever we can! we will torture people! (-) we got to do whatever we can to keep Americans safe! (-) nine people (-) shot in a church (---) what about that? (-) ey what are you going to do, crazy is as crazy is, right? (---) that is the part (-) that I cannot, (-) for the life of me, (-) wrap my head around (--) and you know it! (-) you know (-) that it is going to go down the same path this is a terrible tragedy (-) they are already using (-) uh uh the nuanced language of lack of effort (--) for this (-) this is a terrorist attack, this is a, a violent attack on (-) on the Emanuel church in South Carolina, which is a symbol (-) uh for the the Black community it has stood (-) uh in that part of Charleston (-)for (-) a hundred and some years, and has been attacked viciously many times as many Black churches have (--)and (-) to pretend that- I, I heard someone on the news say, (-) well tragedy has visited this church this this was not a tornado (--) this was a racist (--) this was a guy (-) with a Rhodesia badge on sweater (--) uh- uhm you know- so the idea that we are, you know, I even hate to use this pun, but this one (--) is black and white (-) it is there is no nuance here (-) this is- (-) uh (-) (5.0) and (--) we are going to keep pretending like-, (--) Ido not get it (-), what happened (-) there is one guy lost his mind (-) but this- we are steeped in that culture in this country and we refuse to recognize, and I cannot believe (-) how hard people are working (-) to discount it (--) uh (3.0) in South Carolina, (2.0) the roads (-) that black people drive on (-) are named for confederate generals, (---) who fought, (-) to keep Black people from being able to drive freely on that road (---) that is (--) that is insanity! (--) that is racial wallpaper that is that is- you cannot (-) allow that (--) you know (-) nine (-) people were shot (-) in a black church (--) by a white guy, (-) who hated them, (-) who wanted to start (-) some kind of civil war (4.0) uh (---) the confederate flag (--) flies over South Carolina, (--) and the roads are named for confederate generals, (4.0) and the white guy is the one who feels like his countries are being taken away from them (3.0) we are bringing it on ourselves (-) and that is the thing, (-) Al Qaeda, (-) all those guys, (-) ISIS, (---) they are not a shit, (-) compared to the damage (-) that we can apparently do to ourselves (-) on a regular basis (--) so (--) uh (-) our guest tonight (-) is an incredible person, (-) who suffered uh (-) unspeakable violence, uh (-) by extremists, (-) and her perseverance, (-) and uh (-) determination through that uh (-) to continue on is an incredible inspiration (-) and to be quite honest with you, (-) I do not think, there is anyone else in the world, (-) I would rather talk to you tonight, (-) than Malala (-) so, (-) that is what we are going to do, (-) and (-) sorry about (--) no jokes We are going to need common sense solutions (--) to our problems, (-) if we are not just going to win the future, (--) but make sure that everybody else loses it. (3.0) let us start (-) with a simple problem, (-) Mexican drug cartels (2.0) they are engaged in a bloody campaign of death and destruction, (-) often fueled by assault rifles- (-) their gun runners (-) cross our borders to easily purchase (--) I assume a couple of possible solutions might be (--) improve our border security (--), restrict rifle sales to (--) non-Mexican drug cartel members (3.0) let us see what our own (-) Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms (--) has come up with. [voice over] It is a government program, (-) called operation fast and furious- US Firearms Agency (-) superior officers specifically told them not to intervene (--) as they secretly watched while gun runners (-) purchased illegal firearms in the United States (--) and sent them to Mexico [voice over] The ATF officials thought, (-) if we could just track these guns and see where they are going, (-) maybe we can arrest the cartel leaders, who are using these guns (2.0) Maybe (5.0) or (2.0) so what- these drug cartel runners (--) took the guns to Mexico (---) uh (3.0) how- (---) how do we know what happened to the guns? (-) [video recording] I can tell you that (--) after a trip to Radioshack with ATF funds, I (---) myself manufactured a GPS tracking device that would fit (-) inside the handle of an AK variant rifle. (4.0) Jon Stewart,(-) Daily Show, I have a quick question (-) uh as a frequent Radioshack costumer, (-) I may be qualified to tell you (-) what I think may be an issue with your plan, (1.0) but go ahead. [video recording] The problem was (-) that it was the limited battery life. (10.0) See the batteries at Radioshack are designed to work with one of the (-) remote control little helicopters that works (--) once (2.0) so now we know the GPS tracking systems for the (---) assault rifles resold Mexican drug cartels did not work (--) uh (--) how do we find out (-) where the guns are? (-) what is Plan B? (--) [voice over] The only way, you are going to find (-) those guns in Mexico (--) is where? At crime scenes (-) in which (--) either the bad guy was killed and his gun was left at the scene, (-) or (--) or (--) used drainer at the commission of a crime at which (-) that that was left behind (1.0) Okay! (2.0) so our plan to prevent American guns from being used in Mexican (-) gang violence (-) is to provide Mexican gangs (---) with American guns (2.0) to use, (-) according to our plan, for (2.0) violence (2.0) how exactly do we convince the Mexican government to cooperate in this, (---) let us call it, a plan (---) They were not cooperating (-) uhm (-) partly (-) be(-)cause they did not know about it (-) they were never informed that this (--) operation was taking place (14.0) If Mexico is not cooperating- (3.0) even if there was violence with the guns that were left behind, how would we find- (--) you know what? (-) never mind (2.0) if this is the plan (-) that they went with, (--) what plan did we reject? (1.0) ey I got it! (--) let us put a tiny microphone in every bullet! (2.0) and we hope (-) that when the bad guys and criminals, (--) you know want to shooting people, (-) they say the name like nobody fucking put alarms (incomprehensible)! (1.0) b-hehehehehehehehe! (--) you know what I mean? (2.0) [voice over] (incomprehensible) was a little to blame jay bawl's idea coming out of the ATF's local office- Couple of guys going renegade, and not running things through the chain of command at the ATF's responsible adults, like (-) their acting director, Ken Melson- (-) he did not know. (--) Memos, released last week, show (-) that Melson not only knew (-) about operation fast and furious, (-) but he got a weekly briefings about it. -This acting director of the ATF had set up a video feed in his office (-) uh so he could watch (-) some of those straw bias taking place. You are baiting me (1.0) so the ATF did not just know about this plan, (-) he was vetoing it! (3.0) we are not to worrying folks, (-) the house of oversight committee has launched an investigation, (---) and (-) the department of justice, of which the ATF is a subsidiary, (-) is fully cooperating (-) with it! (-) they handed in a nine-hundred page report, (--) to the congressional committee, (-) detailing the entire (--) buying of assault rifles operation. (--) Sir, (---) if you gonna count pages like this (-) as a discovery, (--) you should be ashamed of yourself (-) if pages go on like this forever! (--) you have given us black paper instead of white paper! (-) you might as well have given us reams tell on its original binder. (2.0) What? (--) no! (-) no (-) you do not get it! you are upset? no! they (-) gave you- (-) those are priced Mondrian's from his famed (---) black period. (3.0) they are priceless! (2.0) I mean worthless! (2.0) actually no, (-) let us check something (-) for when the graphics are filtered, (-) and removed their redactions, (-) maybe we can see what the DRG is hiding (--) aaaah! (3.0) we will be right back. Ah, I got to be honest with you (--) last week (-) with everything that was going on in in the world (-) and in Baltimore in particular was a tough one (-) a lot of chaos and confusion (--) so I was having a good weekend, coming in today, I (-) I was feeling (-) fresh, (-) fresh start, (-) yeah I felt good (--) [voice over] News breaking over night from Texas (-) two heavily armed men (-) opened fire at an event featuring a cartoon contest. [voice over]Both suspects (-) are dead after being shot by police officers (--) So, so, so my weekend was good until (---) fuck! well, thank God no innocent people were killed, (-) but but who shoots up a cartoon contest? (-) granted, (-) Ziggy is not what it used to be, (-) but uhm (--) you know what I think, Garfield's been coasting for a long time family circus (-) it it was no even jokes, it is like an actual circus (-) it seeks to entertain, (-) but it really just fills you with sadness (3.0) so what kind of cartoon (-) contest there, (-) as if I do not know, (-) would provoke such a violent reaction? (--) [voice over] A group called American Freedom Defense Initiative, notorious for its anti-Islamic views, (--) hosting this award ceremony (-) to give more than ten-thousand dollars (-) to the best cartoon, depicting the prophet Muhammad (---) Hum, see that is (--) fucking crazy (2.0) ten-thousand dollars to a cartoonist? (5.0) that is like five years' salary (3.0) that cartoonist could almost consider quitting their two other jobs (2.0) at two different cold brew coffee shops (--) uh (---) well, that you know, that that is the group AFDI that is the same group that let protest against the the so called ground zero mosque, (-) and (-) has been plastering New York's subways with anti-Islamic advertisements AFDI (--) is a first amendment group the same way (---) people from Philly are sports fans (-)ostensibly, (-) they like sports (2.0) but really (-) they are just looking for an excuse to punch a stranger, or pour beer on someone's baby (--) so, (--) but even so, (--) even so, (2.0) I cannot believe we have to reiterate this (1.0) it is not okay (-) to shoot other people (-) because you are offended by what they draw! (--) even if they drew it (-) to offend you! (2.0) no shooting of them! (---) never okay to shoot people! (-) never ever okay [to shoot-]! [Ok], well, (-) hold on (-) wait (-) wait, wait, wait, wait jon, (-) what I like, really do not like them? (2.0) You cannot shoot people! (1.0) Ah, ah, (-) okay yeah fine. You cannot shoot people! (---) you cannot shoot people because you do not share their opinions (--) you cannot shoot people, (-) even if they offend you! [you]-! [Wha]t if, (--) what if I, like, have not shot anyone in a long time? (---) No! (--) still not okay! Okay. (1.0) Not even, if those people specifically set out to provoke you, (-) responding to cartoons, (-) or words, (-) or ideas (-) with violence (---) is wrong! it is-! But what if (-) someone (-) is creating a climate of hate and intolerance (-) by appealing to people's basest fears? 'cause then you just got to- No! (--) you cannot- no! (--) no! (-) the violence just perpetuates (-) the fear! (-) you cannot (-) thank you. (1.0) Oh (-) You-! (3.0) are you not going back down, like the rest of them, or are you going to just uh-? It is kind of crammed down there (-) so I was just going to- (-) I feel like hanging out here, you know- Also Jon, (---) what if it is like deer hunting season, and I really thought that that cartoon contest was like a deer, (-) you know what [I mean?] [No shooting!] (-) there is no shooting of people! (-) there is no shooting of-! (9.0) I agree with you, Jon, (-) we should be able to shoot people! No! (---) I said, (-) and Al Madrigal, (-) I have not seen you in like six months (-) whe- when did you get here? (---) I have been down here the whole time, man (3.0) And where is this pizza coming from? if you guys are having a party under my desk, and you did not even invite me, than it it is not right. (1.0) It was more of like an impromptu thing, (--) really. Yeah (-) you know what, (-) it was like a small thing, you know? Yeah. Uhu! you guys (---) are missing all on the sssh (---) on the pizza! (-) missing that pizza! (3.0) who! (2.0) Get out of here! (-) shoo, skat, all you guys, get out of here! (---) just go! (-) cannot shoot people! (---) you are not supposed to shoot people! (3.0) I hope that settles it! (2.0) now, uh uh, th- the question of course was yesterday's attack in Texas an isolated incidence, (-) or part of a more menacing trend (-) because we have been hearing about this (-) fictionally for a while now. At least ten ISIS fighters have been caught coming over the Mexican border in Texas (-) ISIS (-) knocking on our Texas borders- Oh that is easy (-) just do not answer (3.0) if ISIS knocks, (-) just shut the lights out and lie there (2.0) never fear, (-) Uncle Sam is not going to let ISIS ring and run you, Texas (-) in fact,(-) not only is the US military conducting training ops right now, (-) for missions against ISIS-like groups, (-) guess where they are doing them. Texas is one of seven states, (-) where the exercises will be held (--) The special forces' training operation called (-) Jade Helm Fifteen. Ah! (-) Jade Helm Fifteen (-) I have that issue (--) it is uh (-) it is uh (--) uh she (2.0) imprisons Captain American Jadeopolis, (-) I think (-) rest easy, Texas (---) good guys with guns (--) are on the case. Conspiracy theories are running wild tonight (-) about the army's plan for a multistate training exercise this summer, (-) called (-) Jade Helm Fifteen (-) while the military says it's just training soldiers for the realities of war, (-) critics say the army is preparing for (-) modern day martial law. Some are calling it a Texas takeover. (3.0) You know who is calling it Texas takeover? (-) Lone Star lunatics (2.0) Dallas (incomprehensible swearword) and Houston assholes (--) Texas, (--) there is no Texas takeover (--) the United States government (-) already controls Texas (2.0) since like the eighteen-forties (--) and then he left, and he came back, and (-) just borrow a textbook from the neighboring state, (-) it is all in there (3.0) here is how unbelligerent (-) here is how unbelligerent the US military is towards Texas (-) they sent a lieutenant colonel to a local Texas town hall, (-) to waste his time. (2.0) All we want to do (-) is make sure that our guys (-) are trained for combat (-) overseas It is (-)a (-) preparation for martial law. That is because it is not a preparation for martial law, sir. That is what you say. (5.0) See that right there? (---) right there? (--) that is the face of someone realizing they are not getting around the public comments on the planned parking lot down by Kroger's, (-) not today (2.0) not in this meeting (2.0) but come on, (-) crazy people attend local town hall meeting is not a Texas specific story (-) I think the constitution says (-) you cannot hold a town meeting without (--) crazy people (-) I think it is in there. (2.0) it is not like this is being taken seriously by anyone who holds actual power (---) [voice over] On Tuesday, (-) governor, Greg Abbott, ordered the Texas state guard to monitor military personnel movements and training exercise scheduled, (-) and ensure that safety and constitutional rights of Texans (-) were not being violated. (--) Oh dear lord (--) yet another waste of Texas funds (-) that could have been spent on actual threats (---) like your infamous (-) chainsaw massacres (3.0) I mean, (--) Texas, (-) it is not as if I do not find it adorable that your governor thinks your state guard could take on the United States military (---) it is like a (--) little dog (-) growling at a big dog (---) or (--) an eight-year-old (-) picking a fight with (---) the predator uhm,(-) but (-) but enough with the fearmongering (--) you know these types of exercises have been going on in Texas for years, (-) right? You are gonna have Marine Air out here (-) you are gonna have Marine Ground, Army Ground (-) you gonna have Air Force Air, (-) Navy Air, (-) all fighting jointly (-) it is a good exercise. (--) Yeah, (-) Texas (--) operation Roving Sands (--) in fact, (-) the 2001 Roving Sands operation was the largest exercise of its kind in history (-) but it then (-) pre-oops governor Rick Perry (-) start spreading fear about a Texas takeover? (--) he did not (--) Texas was fine with the concept (-) of widespread military operations in their state (-) in the two-thousand-ots (-) I do not know what has changed (-) since then, (-) oh, (-) alright (4.0) America elected a brutal socialist, Muslim, Kenyan, ineffective, h Harvard-schooled constitutional professor (-) agitator (-) warlock (2.0) so Texas, (2.0) it appears, (3.0) it appears, you are on the verge of being taken over by ISIS, (-), or (-) the United States of America (2.0) so, you have a choice to make (---) and when you make it, (-) just remind yourself, (-) and I never thought I would be saying this, (---) what would Rick Perry do? Welcome back! (-) for more on the gun debate(--)we are bringing the first part of the three part series, (-) with John Oliver. [voice over] Yesterday, Americans watched in shock (-)as even watered down gun legislation died on the floor of the senate.(-) but that is exactly where it belongs, (-) according to gun lobbyists like Philip van Cleave of the Virginia Citizens Defense League. The Second Amendment, (-) uhm you know, (-)is, is sacre saint. You hold up this sign, (-) whenever I make a suggestion that you think (-) is infringing upon your Second Amendment rights, (-) okay? Okay. A sold weapons ban (---) boom there it is, increased back ground checks (---) really? yes. Just for, just for background checks? We do not do background checks for the First Amendment. Okay, so let us just try this one Okay. Nice and easy. Sure. A mandatory one hour waiting period, if you buy a gun. (2.0) Why- why a man-[datory] [Philip, are you] fucking kidding me? Okay, so I cannot see a reason no I cannot think of anything (-) that I support because at the end of the day, (-) none of it works. [voice over] Exactly (--) gun control (-) does not (-) work What if (--) hypothetically speaking, (-) what if gun control could work? (--) which obviously cannot, (-) so (-) we know that it will not (-) so that is not a problem but what if it could, (-) due to the time that it did. Hm okay so when=when was that? Australia. [voice over] Yes, (-) Australia in 1996 (-)a conservative Prime Minister John Howard instituted sweeping gun control laws following a mass shooting that shocked the nation so should we be learning from this effective example? (--) of course not. I guess if we're going to planet x,(-) and say it is not the United States, it's uhm some other planet, different people, different everything (--) I do not know yeah but it, but in the real world with human beings it is not going to work, and we banned the (incomprehensible)' [voice over] Unfortunately, not only is Australia actually in the real world, (-) even their animals can holster weapons so, who is right about gun control? there was only one way to find out: (-) confront (-) the man responsible (---) Mister Prime Minister, let us begin in the formal Australian way, (-) good day. How are you - how do you do? (--) Obviously, gun control does not work, it cannot work, it will never work so how was your scheme a failure? (---) Well, my scheme was not a failure we had a massacre at a place called Port Arthur seventeen years ago, (-) and there have been none uhm since. [voice over] Zero gun massacres? hold on (-) did gun control actually work? It stopped one thing that could also be a statistically anomaly. Yeah (-) it was just (-) their (-) mass shootings disappeared. But there were so few of them (-) whoop-de-doo? Whoop-de-doo? Yeah! Whoop-de-doo? Yes, their mass shootings are rare anyhow. [voice over] Exactly (-) they probably barely had a massacre before 1996. There were about thirteen in the previous eighteen years. In the eighteen years before (--) Port Arthur, there were thirteen mass shootings (--) Yes. Almost one a year. =Yes, I was unaware they had that many (--) mass being what, more than two people at a time? More than four. More than four (-) okay. Whoop-de-doo? [voice over] But perhaps, there were other (-) non-whoop-de-doo-side-effects. The homicide rate (--) uhm involving the use of guns (-) has declined significantly (-) by factors of up to fifty and sixty percent, (--) and the incidence of youth suicides involving guns has declined (-) dramatically. (2.0) Whoop-de-fucking-doo? [voice over] Help me out here, Philip. Homicides with guns went down (-) suicides with guns also went down (-) zero mass shootings. What what they have in Australia has still has murders, rapes and robberies last I checked. Unless you can get rid of one-hundred percent of crime, (--) it is not worth doing at all. Well, put it this way (-) it is illegal to have crack cocaine anywhere in the United States (-) do you think, if somebody really wants it, they can't get their hands on crack cocaine in America? So unless we cannot get completely rid of drugs, there is no point of having drug-laws at all? (7.0) Let me think about that for a minute uhm (3.0) well, (-) I guess effectively, (2.0) it does not work! [voice over] You cannot argue with Philip (-) even his logic is bulletproof. Well, let me, let me put it to you this way (-) there are more drownings in backyards, where they have pools (---) they do not have a pool, (-) there were no drownings in backyards, okay? so (--) the US has a very high number of guns, therefore (-) there is going to be (-) more (-) chances (-) for somebody to be killed with a gun. Right. (2.0) Right. (1.0) Right (3.0) that is my point (--) [voice over] Philip might think (-) that living in a society with dramatically reduced gun violence is a whoop-de-doo (-) and people in Australia (-) could not agree with him more. whoop-de-doo! whoop-de-doo, mate? [whoop-de-doo?] [whoop-de-doo?] [whoop-de-doo?] [whoop-de-doo?] whoop-de-doo? for whatever that means. whoop-de-fucking-doo? John Oliver! we will be right back. Welcome back.(-) so last week (-) as we were watching on the show last week, (-) we learnt that while our United States senate was unable to pass even the most basic gun control measures, (-) Australia (--) has had a successful gun control scheme for almost two decades. (-) John Oliver visited our cousins from across a couple of ponds (-) to find out more in part two (-) of our three part series. [voice over] In 1996 following a massacre,(-) Australia's conservative government enforced a national buyback of semiautomatic weapons (-) while also heavily regulating the purchase and storage of other firearms (-) the result was dramatically reduced levels of gun violence (-) so why cannot we do that here? (-) to find out, (-)I sat down with long time aid to Harry Reid, Jim Manley (--) The NRA is still a very powerful force in this country. (-) they have four million members, who are very very determined to get their way. And how can a nation of three-hundred million compete with that? (---) It is difficult to understand sometime, is it not? (-) but the fact of matter is (-) that you gotta think long and hard, (-) uhm, before you support gun control legislation (-) because taking on the NRA (-) can be political suicide.(--) [voice over]And the democratic party is working tirelessly to reduce the rate of political suicide among its members (-) surely, (-) Australian politicians were not stupid enough (-) to end their political lives for gun control Well, I did (--) What (-) what? (--) I did (--) You did what? (1.0) I took the stand (-) I was prepared to face the political consequences, (-) and (-) we delivered gun control.(--) [voice over] Meet Rob Borbidge, (-) former Premier of Queensland, (-) Australia's most conservative state (-) in 1996, (-) he was instrumental in enacting gun control, (-) knowing it would cost him his political career (-) in the next election (-) (--) We paid a, a high political price, (-) but we did the right thing (-) look, (-) there are Australians (-) alive today (-) because we took that action I mean how much is a life worth? (-) [voice over] But Jim Manley knows that a true public servant has more important concerns (-) What makes a politician successful? getting re-elected by uh his or her constituents. (2.0) Right (--) yeah (-) that that is how you judge success (--) Oh (-) okay (-) that is (-) uhm (---) well, (--) you know, getting legislation done. (---) Yeah, is second? Is second, (-) yes. (--) So that is second? (---) holy shit, (-) that is second? Aaaah, (---) if I could rewind this tape, I would say getting legislation done and getting re-elected by your constituents. (--) But since you cannot rewind the tape (-)let us just go with the answer you gave on instinct (-) If you do not get uh re-elected, uh (-) you know, you just road- roadkill in the political process uhm and you, you are just another loser (--) [voice over] Tragically (-) not everyone understands this. (--) What makes a politician successful? go! Making society a better place (-) No, no, (-) no rob, (-) no look we can uhm (---) we can actually rewind the tape (-) are we (-) rolling? (2.0) what makes (-) a politician (-) successful? (--) Well, it is your responsibility (--) to (--) govern (--) in the best interests of the people that you serve (-) Ro-Rob, (-) uh I am uh I am uh going on a limb here, and I have already told someone else that I cannot do this, when I can. I hope you have a lot of tape. [voice over] True success as a lifelong politician like Harry Reid, (-) whose watered down gun legislation was carefully designed to protect those (-) who needed it most. He has a responsibility as the democratic leader (-) to protect uh the caucus (-) Right the caucus needs to be, (-) the caucus does. (--) They need to be protected politically. How many (-) political careers have been tragically ended by gun control? (-) We have lost some good folks uh uh over the years because of their view. Right uh (-) you have a perfectly healthy political career and then, bang! (--) Just like that! [voice over] Which means (-) former Australian prime minister, John Howard, has blood on his hands (-) Do you ever think (-) about the innocent victims (-) of your gun control? There were no innocent victims of my-, and there were no victims at all. (2.0) yeah, that is the photograph of Rob Borbidge (-) he was incredibly courageous politically in supporting our laws (-) But politically (-) he is dead, bang,(-) just like that. Well, he lost an election (-) that (-) we all do at some point. [voice over] But Howard is not alone (-) his Deputy Prime Minister, Tim Fischer, (-) also refuses to accept responsibility for these career massacres.(-) So, (-) you do not look at these faces, (--) and feel guilt? (1.0) Well, (-) they are alive and uh- They are dead, they are politically dead (-) I uh hope that uh (--) those who totally veto (--) any move (-) to bring sensible semiautomatic and automatic (-) weapon control to the suburbs of America (-) are also politically dead (-) but physically alive. (---) [voice over] Not if I could help it (--) never again, will a political career end in a senseless act of meaningful legislation. (1.0) What is that commemorating? (--) It is just uh, all of these uhm (-) all of them are dead, (-) politically. (1.0) Uh okay. Not physically, physically they are probably safer than [ever. [Uh okay right. The world is a very dicey thing (-) I mean uh again (-) just uh just uh (-) this is just a rearrange physically they are absolutely fine (--) but it makes you think (-) Sure does. Yeah. [voice over] Unfortunately, what spending time with politically dead Australian politicians made me think about was how horribly wrong we have it in America (-) Thanks for speaking with me, Rob (-) Pleasure. You are a great human being. Thank you. It is just by all (-) American standards you are a shit politician (-) and the fact that that is true (-) is why I am now going to walk into the fucking ocean. [voice over]In America, we are told (-) gun control is not possible (-) but in Australia, (-) they have shown it is (-) providing a fantastic lesson for America (-) to ignore. (6.0) John Oliver! we will be right back! Hey, welcome back! (--) we continue tonight (--) our series (-) from Australia John Oliver learnt that (-) following a mass (-) shooting in Australia, (-) the country introduced gun control, and (-) it (-) worked! so how can America take this valuable lesson (--) and ignore it? John Oliver finds out in this, (-) our final installment (--) [voice over] Previously, I went to Australia, (-) where I learnt that in 1996 their government enacted sweeping gun control laws (-) the result: (-) reduced gun violence and zero mass shootings.(-) so are there any lessons for America here? (-) Virginia gun advocate, Philip van Cleave, has a clear answer (-) We are not Australia! (-) it is a very different culture, (-) different people, different everything Right, there is no similarity with Australia? (-) Australia is a former British colony (-) with a wild frontier (-) that was tamed by brave men who also (-) wiped out almost an entire indigenous population, (-) and we are (--) not similar to that, (---) right? Right [voice over] Right! because unlike Australia, (-) we Americans know when the guns are taken away, (-) tyranny inevitably follows (-) The founding fathers knew (-) that governments tend to grow (-) uh beyond their means in in America (-) we are stepping in the direction of a police state. (--) Is that really happening, Philip, or (-) is that some kind of crazy paranoia? (-) Ohh, we have police they are now wearing ninja suits if you will I mean you do not know they are police necessarily they have their black masks on and everything- So, (-) it really is not crazy paranoia (-) you are justifiably frightened about ninja police. (--) Yeah (-) ninja police (--) yes.(--) Yeah, (-) ninja police. (1.0) Yes, (-) yeah. [voice over] Sadly without access to semiautomatic firearms, (-) Australians would not know a thing about (-) real freedom. (--) Bloody earth is for free! (-) we just sit here (-) doing whatever we want (-) everybody is just hanging out and having a good time. People do not have the same concerns anymore about uhm getting gunned down when they are in a tourist resort. Yeah (-) but was that worth it? (-) Yes! (-) Was it worth giving up your fundamental freedoms just to not get shot in a gun massacre? (1.0) What the fuck are you talking about? (-) [voice over] Australians must now live in this well-regulated nightmare (-) because of ex-politicians like Rob Borbidge (-) who smuggling thinks that his country (-) has something to teach us (-) I hope (-) that they would have a look (-) at what has happened here. (1.0) Why? (--) would people (--) want to live (--) like this? (1.0) Because they might want (-) a safer (-) society (-) to live in.(---) [voice over] But it is pointless for us to study the Australian experience (-) because their fear of gun control back then (-) has no parallels with ours (--) What kind of things were you hearing when you suggested gun control? (-) That uh (-) government was uh becoming a dictatorship Alright (-) so that is one Uh we we were told that uh people would not have the right to defend their property and their families. Okay (-) so that is definitely t[wo. [Uh th- that democracy is at stake somehow if (-) uh government decides there should be a background check. Uh, yeah alright, three. We were about to be invaded by [by the Indo]nesians- [Yes] that is completely different (--) no one in America (-) is afraid of Indonesians. (1.0) are they afraid of Mexicans and Muslims coming? (---) maybe! [voice over] sure (-) he claims Australians were angry (-) but where is the proof? (-) People's rights are being taken away from them. and I am not going to give up any guns that they gonna take of me.(-) are you gonna give yours up? (-) No! (--) [voice over]Okay, (-) there it is (-) but how do those angry conservatives feel now? (-) my immediate reaction was uh that uh it was an (incomprehensible)action, but as time went on, uhm (-) the regulations (-) were quite manageable.(-) So ho- hold on (-) you did not want to give up your high-powered gun? (1.0) No (-) but uhm (---) I felt as if I had a bit of a duty to (-) the rest of uh (-) society (-) [voice over] And if you thing that sounds bad (incomprehensible) crazy (-) this effective gun control was enacted by conservative politicians (-) against the will of their own base (-) [There is no other way! there is no other way!] (-) [Boo!] (-) But our politicians are different (-) they know (-) that- gun control does not work! [voice over] Or even if it does-. It takes a long time. [voice over] And to be fair, (-) John Howard and his Deputy Prime Minister Tim Fischer have had since 1996 to enact their sweeping reforms (-) It took less than three and a half months. What!? (-) The massacre was on the 28th of April in 1996- Yeah (-). In a twelve-week period shortly following that (--) the bulk of the legislation (-) was devised, (-) drafted, (-) debated (-) and implemented (-) But it, but it does not work! (--) Zero massacres (-) since 1996. Yeah (-) you keep saying that, (-) but gun control does not work! (-) so-. [voice over] My head was spinning (-) I had to clear it the traditional Aussie way [Advertisement Beer!] [voice over] No, (-) not that way (-) a walk-about. (---) The Second Amendment is sacre-sai[nt] [no]! [no! no]! [political suicide] [zero massacres since] [1996, [from my cold, (-) dead hands Ninja [police [Ninja police. (incomprehensible) (1.0) [voice over] What the fuck? (17.0) hu! (-) after three days in the bush with a guy in a kangaroo-suit, (-) it became clear what the real issue with gun control in America is (--) If guns are not the problem, Philip, (--) what is the problem? (--) People! People are the problem? Yes. (1.0) You know what? (---) after spending this amount of time with you, Philip, (-) I am starting to believe that that is partially true (-) Good. (4.0) Good? (1.0) I am glad that you=you understand that people are the problem. Yeah that is becoming just (-) painfully obvious (--) [voice over] After investigating the issue on opposite sides of the earth, (-) I discovered that if Americans really do want gun control, (-) there is actually one thing they can do to get it: (-) move to Australia. (4.0) John Oliver! we will be right back! Tonight's (-) what do you get when you mix a tearful president, some Air Jordans and Dothraki pick-up lines? (--) tonight's episode (-) I am Trevor Noah, (-) and this is the daily show (2.0) [voice over] January 6th, 2016 (4.0) from Comedy Central's world news headquarters in New York (-) this is the daily show with Trevor Noah (12.0) Welcome to The Daily Show, everybody (-) sit down, sit down (-) thank you so much (--) I am Trevor Noah (--) our guest tonight- I am really really excited about this (-) you know, how in uh in Game of Thrones (-) they make up all those languages, right? well, (-) well the guy we got on the show today, uh, he actually makes them up (-) author of The Art of Language Invention, (-) David J. Peterson, is here everybody! (2.0) yeah! (1.0) yeah! (2.0) ah, and what a day it has been (-) did you see North Korea? they farted uhm (---) but we do not know what it is (-) because they said there was a bomb North Korea's like a, like a hydrogen bomb and then the world is like, no it is not a hydrogen bomb, (-) and we do not we do not know (-) that is the weird thing with North Korea (---) it is almost like (-) they are like a really spoiled brat in their room, (--) and the rest of the world just has to guess (-) what are you doing in there? (---) what are you doing? (-) I am going to check (-) oh just leave him, (-) just leave him (-) he is just being a teenager (--) insane news (-) but in our main story, (--) we talk about something, (-) we never get to talk about: (3.0) guns (---) pointy, pointy, (-) bang, bang sticks (2.0) in 2014, (-) the United States saw a huge number of reported gun deaths (-) 33,599, (-) to be exact (--) to put that into perspective, (--) that is the entire population (-) of Monaco (---) a place where people only die because of gout (-) and roulette injuries (3.0) the point is, (3.0) I do not even know, (-) what that injury is (-) I (-) was just- the guy was- (-) I lost ten-thousand dollars on a guy who died on red (--) the point is, despite the death toll, and even though, eighty-nine percent of Americans support universal background checks, (--) not much progress has been made in the way of passing laws (-) to restrict access to guns (-) and in fairness (-) to American legislators, (--) it is because they have been really busy, (-) loosening gun laws (--) you see, you you can't do two things at once (---) now, every time president Obama has tried to enact gun control measures, (-) he has seen his proposals disappear before his eyes, (-) which I can only imagine, (-) must be really frustrating (-) uh at time, even bewildering (---) the best way I can describe it, (-) is uhm, (-) is using this this this little video here, you see? (--) look at this racoon (--) and imagine that this racoon (-) is the president of the United States (---) now, (-) imagine (-) the delicious cotton candy between his very paws, (-) is the president's best efforts (-) to pass common-sense gun-regulations (---) and the water (--) is the American political process (---) good luck, mister president (8.0) uh! (---) poor racoon Obama! (---) you can almost see the confusion on his face like ah I I do not know what what happened (-) I proposed the gun controls (-) I had it in my hand I do not know what happened (2.0) so all of this, (-) is what brought us to the big news yesterday (-) president Obama announced that he was going to go around Congress (-) and do something about gun violence with executive actions (-) which is great (--) because something will get done finally (-) and also because uh, (-) executive action sounds pretty cool, yeah (-) it does it sounds like Obama's finishing move in the wrestling ring, you know? (-) it is time (-) for the executive action! (-) and then he just pile-drives Mitch McConnell through the center for- it is the executive action! (3.0) and what Obama said was so crazy, (--) it ripped a hole in the spi- time-space continuum, (---) and it made people angry, (--) before he even said what he was going to say (--) [voice over] Republican White House hopefuls condemned the president's actions, (-) even before the details were released. This is a total ruse (-) this is classic Obama. It is not constitutional. His first impulse always is to take (-) rights away from law-abiding citizens. Well, he can abuse his power all he wants (-) he has a phone, (-) and he has a pen (-) but if you live by pen, (-) you die by the pen (-) and my pen has got an eraser! (5.0) Uh, (--) I think the amazing pen you are describing (-) is a pencil (4.0) but uh, but if you are looking for a new pen, (-) Ted Cruz, (-) then you have got to check out the great deals that they offer on the website (-) Pen Island uh, (-) you will not believe (--) what they got there (3.0) oh, and everyone else, (-) who is not Ted Cruz, (-) please do not go to the website Pen Island (2.0) no, it will crash your computer and destroy it forever (--) do not go to their websites (1.0) Mister Cruz again, (-) that website is (---) Pen Island. (4.0) you know the thing that amazes me about this whole situation (-)is how all those people knew, (---) that they opposed Obama's gun control plans, (-) before they even heard them they can see into the future (-) sort of like those precogs from Minority Report (--) I want to hear (-) what Obama actually said. (-) I wanna be absolutely clear at the start (-) I believe (-) in the Second Amendment (--) it is there written on (-) the paper (3.0) it guarantees (---) the right to bear arms (3.0) no matter how many times people tried to twist my words (--) around, (3.0) I taught constitutional law, (--) I know a little bit about this. (3.0) Okay (--) well, a little bit cocky, (-) but uh (-) I mean- but cool, (-) we get it (-) we get it (-) he knows the Second Amendment exists, (-) and that is a good start for everyone, (-) right? (-) and Obama's speech was not just jokes, (-) you know, it was just that would be weird (-) the president has also laid out his actual plans. (1.0) Number one (---) anybody in the business of selling firearms (--) must get a license and conduct background checks (-) number two (---) we are going to do everything we can to ensure the smart, (-) and effective enforcement (--) of gun safety laws that are already on the books (-) number three, (--) we are going to do more to help those suffering from mental illness (-) number four (--) we are going to boost gun safety technology. (1.0) Some, (-) uhm, (-) interesting ideas, (-) and the final one, boosting gun safety technology (--) it is a great idea for the president, (-) a horrible idea for a call of duty upgrade (2.0) yes, (-) I just unlocked the safety technology upgrade! (-) two weeks safety course (-) alright guys (-) see you in two weeks (--) uh-ah (2.0) so, (-) so the president is proposing some very, very basic ideas to curb gun violence (-) but for many, (-) it was most notable about the president's speech, (-) was not so much what he said, (--) as how he said it. Our unalienable right to life and liberty and the pursuit of happiness- (-) those rights were stripped (--) from college kids, (-) in Blacksburg, (-) and Santa Barbara (2.0) and from high-schoolers at Columbine (4.0) and, and from first graders (---) in Newtown (6.0) first graders (6.0) and from every family who (--) who never imagined (-) that their loved one would be taken (--) from our lives by a bullet from a gun (15.0) See that thing you are feeling right now? (---) that pain in your chest? (--) that comes from watching someone weep on national television (---) because he knows that society can do better than to file the shooting (--) of children under shit happens? (---) that feeling? (--) is how you know that you are human (2.0) no matter how opposed to Obama's policies some people may be, (-) or how cynical their politics (-) they have to at least acknowledge and respect (--) the role authenticity of that emotion (3.0) also you would think (--) Where was the wiping away of tears and the emotion after after the Paris attacks? He cannot pull that kind of passion for anything but this but I feel bad about those kids in Connecticut (-) but it is only about this (-) that he gets so upset about and never about terror. He did not cry after San Bernardino (-) did he cry? (-) did he cry after that? No, (-) I do not think. Did he cry after Paris? No. I would check that podium for like a raw onion, (-) or some more tears I mean (-) I just, I just think it is not really believable Are you fucking kidding me? (2.0)shedding tears when you think of murdered children is not really believable? (---) you know what? there is something here (-) that is not really believable (--) the fact that the rest of us, (--) have to share the title of human being (-) with you. I have to talk about Saturday night's devastating attack, (-) and not as a host of a show, (-) but as a human being (--) in Orlando, Florida, (-) we saw what had happened, and and I could not be more sad and sickened (-) by the events (--) and neither could president Obama, (-) who spoke yesterday to the nation (-) from the White House's James Brady press briefing room (-) because that is how much gun violence is a part of American life (-) even the room, the president talks about gun violence from, (-) is named (-) for a victim of gun violence (--) and so, it was yet another one of the president's post-mass-shooting addresses (--) Today marks (-) the most deadly shooting in American history (---) the shooter was apparently armed with a handgun (-) and a powerful assault rifle (2.0) this massacre is therefore a further reminder (---) of how easy it is for someone to get their hands on a weapon that lets them shoot people in a school, (-) or in a house of worship, (-) or a movie theatre, (-) or in a nightclub (2.0) and we have to decide if that is the kind of country we wanna be. (1.0) I wonder if president Obama ever thought (-) to himself that (-) mass shooting speeches would be such a big part of his job (-) because uh you know, at this point,(-) he has hosted twelve state dinners, (--) but he has had to give sixteen (-) mass shooting addresses (--) so right now, (-) the White House is using more Kleenex than it is good napkins (--) and the president- (-) he made a powerful point (--) America has to decide (-) if this is the kind of country that it wants to be and the saddest part is, (-) every time this happens (--) it feels like America has already decided (--) this is exactly the kind of country it wants to be (--) because we know how this always plays out (-) we are shocked, (-) we mourn, (-) we change our profile pics, (-) and then, (-) we move on (-) it has become normal, (-) but I am sorry it may be because I am new, (-) but it is not normal, (-) and it should not be normal (--) we should not allow this (-) to be normal (-) it is not a normal thing it is like milk from almond's, (-) or sushi from Walgreen's (-) it is not normal, people. (2.0) what is also not normal (-) is having the same thing happen to us over and over and over again, (-) and doing nothing to change it (-) that is not normal (-) you know when I was a kid, (-) I never used to tie my shoelaces (-) because I was an idiot (-) alright? (--) and now, (-) obviously I am an adult, (-) I am still an idiot, but I am an adult (-) and so I only wear Velcro (-) but what I would do as a child is (-) I would run around, (-) I would trip on my shoelaces, (-) I would fall down, (-) I would cry and everything like aah, (-) mommy, mommy, mommy, (-) mommy, and my mom would come over,(-) and she said to me, get up, Trevor (-) get up, get up (-) what happened? (-) and I would say, (-) I fell down (-) I fell down (-) and she would be like, (-) why did you fall? (-) why did you fall? (-) I fell because I tripped (-) and she was like, (-) why did you trip? (-) (incomprehensible) she goes, (-) your shoelaces. (-) and I see I is my showlaces (--) and we would realize, I fell because of the shoelaces (-) and I would tie them (-) and then move on I knew I had to move on, (-) but I had to tie the shoelaces first (-) I had to change something (--) I mean I could have said to my mom, (-) mom, (-) why are you bringing shoelaces into this conversation? (-) why are you blaming the shoelaces for something (-) the sidewalk did to my knees? (--) who even says, (-) there is a connection between untied shoelaces and falling anyway? (-) you are violating my right to keep my shoelaces untied (-) I did not say that (-) I did not say that you know why? (-) because I realized, (-) after falling, (-) after falling a lot, (-) there was a connection between my shoelaces being untied and getting hurt (--) and that is why I did not say that to my mom (-) and that, uh also I did not say that because I realized (-) there was a connection between talking back to my mom and being unable to sit comfortably for a day (--) but that is beside the point (-) the point is, (-) look, (-) this is uhm (-) this is a clearly complicated incident (-) there is elements of terrorism, (-) homophobia, (-) mental health, (-) but is it glaringly obvious (--) America (-) needs to make it a lot harder for people who should not have guns, (-) to get guns (-) and to many of us, (-) it seems crystal clear (-) but there are still people who think (-) we are wrong (-) for even trying to bring that up (--) This is not a gun control issue. It is not about the guns, or the means that ISIS uses. We can have gun debates later (-) this is terrorism (-) terrorism needs to be destroyed It is Islamic terror. We gotta stop getting in the wrong argument, (-) bring this back to the evil that is radical Islam. And to, (-) once again, (-) make this an issue about gun control (-) look, if you go back to 9/11, they used box cutters (--) You now what? (-) this is (-) not something I have ever said before, (-) but I am glad you brought up 9/11 (-) because yes (-) terrorists (-) did not use guns on 9/11. (-) they used planes (-) to kill thousands of people (--) and as soon as we realized that they could use planes as weapons, (-) we worked together as a society (-) we worked our damnest (-) to make it harder for them to ever do that again (-) we locked cabin doors, (-) we expanded the no-fly list (-) we even make everyone pose for x-ray nudes now (---) what we did not do was say, (-) oh, (-) this has nothing to do with airplanes (-) it has everything to do with radical Islam (-) no (-) what we did instead, (-) was regulate air travel (-) to make it harder for the terrorists (-) to do the damage (--) even when fighting ISIS itself (-) we fight the ideology, (-) yes (-) we fight to reduce their resources, (-) but most importantly, (-) we attack their weapon-stores (-) why do we do that? (-) because removing their weapons (-) dramatically decreases their ability to hurt us because everybody knows (-) ISIS without guns (-) is just basically a blog (1.0) so, (2.0) like, (2.0) the irony (5.0) the irony (--) of the situation is that these people say there is no connection between America's gun laws (-) and tel- and terrorism (-) there is no connection between gun laws and terrorism (-) but what is crazy, is, (-) you know, (-) who does see a connection? (--) terrorists (---) and just listen to this Al-Qaeda spokesman, (-) identifying the easy access to guns in America (-) And in the west, (-) you have got a lot (-) at your disposal (--) let us take America as an example (--) America (-) is absolutely awash (-) with easily-obtainable firearms (--) you can go down to a gun show at the (-) local convention center, (-) and come away with a fully-automatic assault rifle, (--) without a background check, (-) and most like, (-) without having to show an identification card (--) so what are you waiting for? (2.0) Sweet lord (-) this guy is selling terrorism like used cars (-) so what are you waiting for? (2.0) this is what we are saying (-) so when people say, this is, this is not about guns, (-) it is about terrorism (-) no (-) it is about terrorism, (-) and it is about guns (-) because (-) you realize, there were two other gun incidents this weekend that did not involve terrorism (-) just two days before this mass shooting, (-) a twenty-three-year old singer, named Christina Grimmie, (-) was also gunned down (-) in Orlando (--) and the day after the nightclub shooting, (-) some other guy got caught driving to an LA gay pride parade, (-) with a shitload of guns in his car (---) this was not related to terrorism (-) and we, we do not know (-) why he had all those guns (-) I mean, maybe (-) he was just mad that everyone kept asking him if he was Elijah Wood (-) we do not know, (--) what it was (--) the point is, (---) the point is, (--) just because there is a problem with terrorism, (-) does not mean there is not also a problem with access to guns (-) and I understand that Americans love guns (-) but this love comes at a cost (---) so far this year alone, (--) this year (-) alone, twenty-three people in America have been shot by toddlers! (--) by toddlers! (-) you realize, (-) we have not even reached the summer (--) right? thus far, (-) twenty-three people have been shot by toddlers (-) we have not even reached the summer (-) summer-toddlers are the worst (-) summer-toddlers do not give a fuck (3.0) it is hot preschool is out (-) you know shit is going to go down (3.0) and the truth is, (-) I know where this argument always ends up (-) it is always gonna be the same thing.(-) the Second Amendment (-) the Second Amendment (-) the right of the people to keep (-) and bear arms (-) shallnot be infringed (-) but, but as much as the NRA want you to believe it is an absolute, (-) it is not, (-) and it never has been (---) because America does regulate guns (--) for example, (-) the Orlando shooter, (-) he could not get a machine gun (--) and it is not because he had not unlocked it yet on call of duty (-) it is because America banned those in the nineteen-eighties (-) because it was obvious (-) that they made it too easy for one person to kill multiple human beings (--) and time after time, (-) we have seen that assault weap- that assault weapons have the same fatal capability (1.0) I think, (1.0) America it is clear here (-) America needs to ask itself the question: (2.0) do you want to be a country (-) that takes reasonablemeasures (-) to protect its citizens, (1.0) or (1.0) should we tell the president (--) to prepare speech number seventeen?